Like many 4-year-olds, my twin boys, Hunter and Troy, love baseball! But when it came time to sign them up for tee-ball, I couldn’t help but be anxious.
Typically, parents wouldn’t bat an eye at signing their twin boys up for the same tee-ball team, but our situation is not so typical. Troy has Down syndrome, and I wasn’t sure how he would be received.
Should I call and tell the coach that one of my boys’ has a cognitive disability? During the first practice should I describe Troy’s low tone, and how it may impact his ability to keep up? During the games should I apologize for my son’s performance?
In the end, I didn’t say anything.
We play backyard baseball all the time. Troy is as good, if not better, than his typical twin brother at hitting, throwing, and catching the ball, which is to say they both suck as much as any 4-year-old that has never played. I hoped his team would accept him as any other first-time player.
We showed up to the first practice, and I could tell Troy was really nervous. The fact is, even though he’s as good as any other kid his age, he hates crowds. I hear about other kids with Down syndrome loving the spotlight. Troy is the opposite. If you laugh or cheer at his successes, he shuts down. I’m not sure if he thinks people are laughing at him, or if it’s too much sensory overload.
His seemingly lack of interest in the game was predictable, but still bummed me out. I wanted his team to see the enthusiastic ball player I watch in our backyard. I did mention to his coach that Troy has Down syndrome, and he may or may not decide to play. “That’s ok, right?” I asked with bated breath.
Coach Kyle, a laid-back father of two, said “This is my first time coaching. I think we’re all nervous. Let’s give him some time to get use to his team and the game.”
This is inclusion at its finest, and Coach Kyle seemed to come by it naturally. There was no hesitation to include Troy. Just an open-mind, and support if needed.
I wish I could say the team’s acceptance of Troy made his apprehension to play go away. It didn’t. He practiced with the team, he even played the field a few innings each game, but when it came time to hit the ball stage fright took over.
It took 5 games for Troy to finally hit the ball. But when he did you could see the pride and pure happiness in his face!
More importantly, you could see the excitement in his teammates and their parents’ faces! They were genuinely excited to have Troy as part of the team, and more important see him succeed.
One particular player, 5-year-old Michael, always made a point to talk to Troy during the games he didn’t play. When Troy played his first full game, you could see the impact it had on Michael. He was so proud of his friend.
Although most of the kids on Troy’s team are too young to understand Troy’s difference, there’s still an important lesson to be learned by his presence. I know these sports encounters will become less as Troy gets older. We expect that Troy will play on typical sports teams, as well as in the Special Olympics. But its these early encounters that change perceptions of individuals with Down syndrome, and opens doors for Troy later. His teammates will one day be employers, teachers, or friends that will remember that Troy is more alike than different.
Sheila says
“Although most of the kids on Troy’s team are too young to understand Troy’s difference . . . ” Too bad we don’t continue to be like this as teens and adults. Though this experience your son is having will help change that! Being on a team and working will help not only the children, but their parents and they will remember this as they grow.
Before my daughter was born, their was a young girl that always came to swim team practice with her sister. The girl has Down syndrome, and I was always impressed with how EVERYONE on the team like how she cheered them on. Everyone in the league new her and could see what a contribution she was making. And she helped prepare me (without knowing) to be an excited mom once I had my own little girl with Trisomy 21.
Courtney says
Yes, changing perceptions must start early!
Dawn says
Courtney, I loved that! The coach sounds like an amazing guy and I love that Troy was welcome but more so, that you realize that the people who interact with him now will have their lives changed by they way they will now view Down Syndrome because of the awesome interactions with your son. Good post mama!
Courtney says
Inclusion is hard, but totally worth it!…for all parties included!
Adelaide Dupont says
Good to see Kyle as a new coach was open to everything.
And 4-year-olds playing tee-ball / soft-ball.
I think my 4-year-old self would have been like Gabbie Perkins in Kristy and the Krushers or a similar Babysitters Club baseball book – Kristy of course is very passionate about the game. She might have made a moderately good Challenger League coach or an inclusionist. And so would Bart have done.
Kimberley Lund says
Have you thought about looking into Special Olympics and see if there is a young athletes program? It is a program for both individuals with and without a disability. I ran it in the school I work at and it was fun and easy to put on. The Special olympics will supported the start up of this program by giving me equipment and curriclulmn. Here is the website for more informationhttp://specialolympicsminnesota.org/athletes/young-athletes/
Courtney says
Thanks for the info Kim. Yes, I’ve heard of both of these fantastic programs. We’ll start when Troy is a bit older.